The Certainties Of Life Ever-changing
My ideas on life have all changed dramatically over the past 2 1/2 years of my life. If you would have told me 6 years ago that I’d be where I am living like I do today, I would have called bullshit on you and said that it was impossible.
Guess what? Life is ever-fucking-changing in the most unseemly and often scary ways imaginable. The old “never say never” saying comes to mind when writing saying this. It’s just too true.
A lot of this journey started when my mom gave me a book: Autoliberación Interior by Anthony de Mello. I’ve read many books in my life, this being the only one I’ve re-read several times and that I could name as life-changing. Unfortunately, there’s no English version that I know of, the closest I’ve been able to find is Rediscovering Life: Awaken to Reality but it’s not a literal translation and lacks some very important parts. If you speak Spanish, on the other hand, I urge you to read it immediately.
It is one of the more personally challenging books I’ve ever read. It made me think about my life and how I see things…hard. I wanted to sit down and bring this man back from the grave to argue with him. I didn’t like how it was written. He confronts and challenges you. I didn’t like what he said about me, people, selfishness, about being, and about love. But I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The more time passes, the more times I read it, and the more I know Anthony de Mello was on to something.
It all comes back to happiness. Who is better off at the end? The one who slaves every hour of the week amassing money and possessions but doesn’t get to live, or the one who works a portion of that and spends his free hours on things that bring ultimate happiness. Things that usually don’t really cost a lot of money. Why slave away for more this and more that (usually possessions) trying to get the next “fix” with no actual understanding of what we are trying to obtain? Unfortunately, this is what in many cultures is the standard, and what we are programmed to do from early on in our lives.
There is nothing wrong with working hard and earning money (that we all need to live) but if it’s not done with an idea of what to use it for, a life to live or a purpose, then it becomes pointless and often a deathly road to eternal dissatisfaction.
Finding the thing you want to do is not always easy, but don’t wait. Don’t plan for sometime in the future. Not when you retire at 75. Soon. Today. Something you can do in the next year. Whatever you want. Work and save money but remember to live and love while you do it.
I’ve just begun to realize all of this myself. I’m learning to love and live hard. To actually enjoy and LIVE every fucking day, trying to soak up all the beauty there is every day. To actively seek the life that I want.
We all have to do this because there’s only one life, too short to let anyone control it, it’s in our hands and we can decide it, and the way we ride it. So go out and smile at someone today and sing with a friend beside you. Choose because you can. Everyone can. Always remember that “sometime in the future” is not real and may never come. Only now, today, this moment, is what matters.
This entry of my blog was written to the tunes of Metallica‘s new album, Hardwired..To Self-Destroy, which brought me a mixed bag of musical feelings that you can check out in my review at Sleaze Roxx.
Tags: anthony de mello, book, books, happiness, life, life flow, love, music